Why are we jealous of our boyfriend’s ex?
You may have recently met your girlfriend’s ex and were shocked to find yourself in the midst of jealousy.
It’s over between them, so rationally you have absolutely nothing to fear, right? Still, you couldn’t help but see that your girlfriend’s ex is… prettier (or more beautiful), smarter, more efficient – or at least that method popped into your mind. In any case, it made you start to question yourself.
Now it’s true that your partner’s ex might be a lot better than you in every way, but it probably isn’t. They broke up for a postman! What is most likely is that you are blowing up its attributes in your mind, as humans tend to do, because you are not completely protected in the relationship.
In particular, you also may not be completely secure in yourself. Despite the fact that you may be having some unfavorable feelings right now, you might actually be able to use this shitty situation as an opportunity to find out about yourself and improve your life.
How? ‘Or’ What? Well, if you are feeling jealous of your beloved’s ex and you don’t know why, take a look at the 5 suggestions below and try to implement them as quickly as possible – before you go. crazy.
What to do when I don’t feel safe with my boyfriend’s ex:
1. Maybe their ex is trying to make you jealous.
It’s unfortunate, but some people are very insecure and have absolutely nothing better to do with their lives than trying to tinker with other people’s relationships.
As unlikely as it is, your boyfriend’s ex might try to make him (and you) jealous by flaunting all of his finest qualities on your face. This could be because she is trying to win the boyfriend back, or because she might just be trying to heal her bruised ego by making herself look better than you.
Simply put, it probably has nothing to do with you. It’s just something she might have to go through, especially if your sweetheart is the one who threw her to the curb. Since you don’t feel safe yourself, you can probably figure it out!
If you think that’s what’s going on, bring it to your sweetheart’s attention. Mention how uncomfortable it makes you that her ex is wearing her skinniest clothes around, bragging about the weight she’s lost and flaunting her brand new six-pack, or whatever. or else.
By bringing this to his consciousness, he may be inclined to avoid it. In fact, if you presume to confront her ex about it yourself, she’ll probably stop. In some cases, all it takes for people to stop acting like vaginal douches is to report them.
What parts of her make you the most jealous?
Is it his appearance? Do you think your partner’s ex is prettier than you? (It’s definitely hard to quantify. “Pretty” can mean anything to anyone. The point is, you think she is much more beautiful.).
Is it his social status? Does she have more money than your family? Better education? More opportunities? A more chic social circle? Does it make you look like a peasant woman to compare yourself to her? Do you feel like you have to make fun of her for buying unnecessarily expensive things?
Is it her intelligence or the way she behaves? Does she seem to be really smart and you feel like a fool every time you connect with her? Do you quickly see why your sweetheart was intrigued by her mind and it bothers you?
Is it the reality that she seems more compatible with your sweetheart? Do you often wonder why he broke up with her, thinking they have a lot in common?
Is she just generally a really good and ethical person? Does she save whales for a living? Is she so kind and caring that it drives you crazy? Do you like her a little, despite yourself? Do you privately want her to be more of a slut so you have a factor to hate her?
Remember to try not to change yourself just because someone broke up with you instead of accepting that part of yourself.
This is where you need to take care of it. Trying to improve upon certain perceived flaws to make yourself more attractive to others, or perhaps just to make yourself feel much better, is a foolish task in the long run.
There is absolutely nothing that you will ever do that can actually give you confidence. This confidence has to come from real love on your own. Accept your flaws first, and then seek to change them if you wish.
Remember you are special
You don’t have to feel jealous of your loved one’s ex for the simple reason that he chose you. They are no longer together, and yet you both have a romantic relationship today. Each day he chooses to continue to be with you, which is not something to think about slowly.